爱华网第二次作业布置大家写按时间顺序组织的作文，抽查了部分同学的，不太满意，文章大多数都比较简单，而且错误也很多，可见大家写作还并未中学毕业，所以必须要努力呀！建议大家多找一些四级范文来背诵或者熟读！
在这里给大家挂上两篇同学的文章，大家感受一下：
No1.
In the morning, I was waked by myclock. SoI washedquickly and then asked my classmates to play basketball. I think itis very interesting. Also we can benefit from it. For example,That could strenth our body. And wecould reduce our weight. After that, we had to stay at my room toread some books. In the afternoon, my friends and I were going shopping all the time. When we gotback, we were very tired, but we were happy.
该篇文章存在的问题：
1. 简单。 单词简单、句式简单，内容简单。
2. 承接用词不恰当。
3. 非句首字母大写
4. 语法仍有错误。
No 2
How beautiful a day
It was a cloudy day, also a weekend. It would bevery confortable If to go outfor a walk.
When the clockawaken me up at 6:00 am, I got up quickly and did my wash,Then I went to the playground donesome sports like running and playing basketball. After that I wentto have breakfast and had a rest. I called my friend Bing when itwas 8:00am and decided to went toBailuzhou. We began our walk along the street and acrossed thebridge. we talked a lot about our school, our town while watchingthe beautiful view when we reached the sands of ganjiang I feltvery happy and ran here and there like a bird. Bing smiled andtaken photos of me when I didn'tcare.
After playing on the sands, we walkedBailuzhou, In there I saw many trees whichvery old and the birds sang and so on. It is a verybeautiful place that I want to stay and Ilike it very much.
When it was about 1:00 pm and we felt alittle tired we went to have our lunch. Then we went back school bybus when it about 2:30.
That afternoon I had nice sleep.
How nice a day and I felt veryhappy.
该篇文章的评析
1. 文章结构清晰，内容丰富，句式也还多样
2. 语法错误较多，意思表达有些含糊。
3. 某些句子拖沓，不简洁，过于堆砌。
总评：
写作是英语综合能力的应用，要写好一篇文章要注意以下几个环节：单词、短语、句子和段落。单词和短语必须平时不断地积累，而句子的运用技巧和段落的安排技巧则需要大家多阅读多学范文。
文章由多个句子组成。一个好句子的标准就是完整、连贯和简洁，也就是说：一个句子首先要表达一个完整的思想（句子完整，意思完整）；句与句之间要有清楚而合理的联系，不能存在以下的问题，例如：平行结构有缺点、代词指代不清楚、逻辑主语和句子主语不一致、人称、数、语态、时态、语气混乱等等；句子不应该堆砌，只要意思表达清楚，用词少不是问题，甚至越少越好。
例如：
1. In my opinion, I think your plan isfeasible.其中I think和 In my opinion就是意思一样的词汇的堆砌。
2. 刚才第二篇文章中的：In there I saw many trees which very old and the birds sang and soon.就过于繁琐，可简化为：There I sawmanyvery oldtrees and birdsinging and so on.
3. 错误：A man is judgednot only by what he says but also by his deed.
正确：A man is judged not only by what hesays but also by what he does.
只有加强英语基础知识，多看多读，才能有效地避免这些错误，才有必要学习一些写作的技巧。
