爱华网author:CaskieStinnett
At noon today I said goodbye to New York forever, thus joiningthat growing group of people who, for one reason or another, havedecided the city is no longer to our liking. This subject---thedeath of the city of New York---continues to be disinterred withsounds of anger and anguish by those of us who should know better.In reality, of course, New York is not a dying city; the eightmillion people who huddle together on that tiny rock do so throughchoice, and while they are aware there is an undiagnosed ailment inthe city’s bloodstream, they are willing to seeit through. It must have beenfun to live in New York once; perhaps it will be again. Those of uswho are quitting are the impatient ones, the ones who lack theimagination to believe that the bright dream will glow again.
The sad aspect of my departure was that there was so littlesadness connected with it and after ten years it seemed to me thatI should have looked back with some slight mistiness in my eyes. Ofcourse, New York and I were never married; we committed a dalliancefor ten years, never anything more serious. No vows were everexchanged, no affection expressed. A lot of literature has beenwritten on this subject---the disenchanted New Yorker---and I’veread much of it, but none of the cases seem to fit precisely myfeelings about the city. I don’t hate New York; there is reallynothing there to hate and certainly very little to love. It is acity of indifference, and that’s the problem. I found I could onlygive indifference in return.
Many people find New York an unattractive city to inhabitbecause of the physical filth, and while, God knows, the city isfilthy, I doubt that that element plays an important role in ourdecision to leave. Naples is far dirtier, and so are Bombay andcountless other cities, but a tolerance for dirt seems to growwhere some fondness exists. Tangiers is one of the dirtiest citiesin the world, yet a friend of mine who possesses flawless tastelives in the casbah there and would live nowhere else. A few daysago in Central Park I saw a man leaning on a litter can drinking acarton of orange juice, and when he finished he tossed thecontainer not in the receptacle but on the ground.
I don’t understand this, but there is a lot about New York Idon’t understand. Mainly, I don’t understand why the city has nosoul, no detectable heartbeat, why the chief element in the city’semotional economy is indifference. I think that’s what sent me onmy way. Vienna almost suffocates the Viennese with care, Parismanages to imbue her own with an obsession for their fulfillment,San Francisco exudes a pride that event gathers to her heart totalstrangers; but the key to New York’s character is that it doesn’treally care about anything. Across the court from the Manhattanapartment that I have occupied for the past few year is a dog thatquite often hurls insults into the darkness, a few of which my dogrefuses to accept service on and makes a tart reply. I think Iyearn for the people of New York to do somewhat the same thing; Iwould like to think they possess a nature that could be stimulatedby something.
A number of New Yorkers have been driven from the city by fear;by the feeling that they are besieged and that if they venture toofar from their neighborhoods they will be mugged or, worse,murdered. I have never been mugged or physically molested in anyway, possibly because my large build does not make me an idealprospect for a hoodlum. Yet I recall the lady who was buying amagazine in the Port Authority Bus Terminal one evening when astranger walked up and disemboweled her with a butcher knife. Laterarrested, he told police that he didn’t know the lady but “justfelt like killing somebody. ” It’s impossible to protect oneselffrom such madness, and I think it is the fool in New York who isnot a coward at heart.
I recall, too, the New Year’s Eve when, after a dinner party, afriend of mine went down to the street to get a taxicab and the cabveered too quickly and hit him. His wife and I took him in the cabto Lenox Hill Hospital, and while we were trying to get emergencytreatment for him the cabdriver was screaming at us for his fare. Afew weeks ago a fifteen-year-old girl was raped on a subway train.The next day the police expressed the opinion that the girl waspartially responsible for the act because she had entered a car inwhich there were no other passengers. All of these things mayhappen in other large cities, and undoubtedly do, but they reflecta lack of caring, a sickness of the soul, that I find difficult toaccept and impossible to forget.
Crime is widespread and New York’s crime statistics are not theworst in the country. Perhaps what troubles me is the worst in thecountry. Perhaps what troubles me is the kinds of crimes that go onhere, the terrible meanness in addition to the offense. I have justread in the paper that three elderly people, sharing an apartmentand all confined to wheelchairs because of cerebral palsy, wererobbed by intruders. Three Mexican tourists who could speak noEnglish were charged $167 for a taxi ride from KennedyInternational Airport to downtown New York. The 217 blindnewsdealers of New York recently complained that their customersare stealing coins from their trays, shortchanging them, andfrequently mugging them on their way home at night. A savings bankguard who assisted blind customers with their deposit andwithdrawal slips was recently charged with forgery and grandlarceny after a blind depositor discovered her balance was $169instead of the $2857 which her Braille accounting indicated shouldbe there. During last year’s Central Park Bicycle Race, five of theracers were attacked and had their bikes stolen while the race wasin progress. This is something of a handicap in a bicycle race.
I can offer no ready acceptance to the theorythat New York’s staggering size creates meanness in the sameproportion. The girls in the shadows of the Madeleine in Pariswhisper a soft “ Bonsoir ” to their prospective customers, butthose in New York seem to feel a need for offensive weapons, as theformer finance minister of West Germany discovered when he wasaccosted by two prostitutes in front of the Plaza Hotel and robbedof $180.
And there is the minor cheating too, so commonplace that it isalmost a game with New Yorkers. Some drivers run through trafficlights for five or six seconds after the light has turned red, andit stirs them with pleasure. The cabdriver conveniently neglects tothrow his flag upon arrival at your destination, and while you arepaying him, an additional ten cents rings up. It seems to pleasehim more than any other money he has made all day. The hatcheckgirl has no change for a dollar. Almost everybody in New Yorkcheats a little.
I had not intended to dwell excessively upon crime in New York,and I have offered these examples to show the nature of the crimesrather than their extent. Nor am I vastly concerned about thepolitics of the city, since the political structure is almosttotally controlled by the labor unions, and the options left opento the mayor and the city council are so slight as to make both ofthem ceremonial institutions and little more. Russell Baker, whosesatire very often brings him close to the hot fire of truth, oncewrote that he was quite familiar with the New York phenomenoncalled “Strike of the Week, ” in which the unions take turns atstopping some vital service; he marveled not that these strikesoccur but that New Yorkers accept the inconveniences so passively.It is true, of course. The indifference that I can’t seem to keepfrom returning to has often led me to wonder if a point exists atwhich New Yorkers will say, “Enough. I will tolerate this nolonger. ”I don’t think so. During the famous blackout ten yearsago, a woman sat in a stalled subway train for eight hours with acake in her lap. When asked why she hadn’t eaten the cake, shereplied: “I just didn’t care that much. ” That’s realindifference.
I don’t want to see children in Central Park playing in unmarkedclumps of poison ivy, and I don’t want to see any more statues andwalls scribbled with spray paint; and I don’t want to ride anymoreon an obsolete and run-down subway system so poorly marked thateven the Transit Authority people find it difficult to givedirections. For some reason, I resent the horrid smartness of acity that sends hundreds of people to eat at Elaine’s, acelebrity-packed restaurant serving mediocre food, because it’sfashionable to be seen there.
New York offers some prizes I shall miss, and I can only hope tofind them elsewhere. A few days ago, after a quick rainstorm, Iwalked across Central Park near the lake and I thought I had neverseen a city so lovely. The steel and glass buildings caught thesunlight, and in the clean air they glowed brilliantly. I passed ayouth on 74th Street one morning recently and for noreason at all he smiled and said, “Hi.” In no other city in thewhole world are there such beautiful girls; they stride rapidly andwith purpose, their faces are filled with vitality, and they seemto meet life eagerly. The tempo of the city itself isexhilarating.
And so I come to the bottom line. I don’twant to live in city where a woman advertises for a lost dog andreceives dozens of telephone calls from a variety of people sayingthey are torturing the animal and will continue to do unless shepays large sums of money; or in a city where I am told I mustalways have $10 in my wallet for a possible mugger because withoutthat I will surely be stabbed; or in a city where my mailman leavesa slip in my box at Christmas suggesting the size of the tip heexpects. I shall find some of these things wherever I go, andperhaps all of them, but I don’t think so. Above all I want to getaway from the indifference of New York. I want to care and ---itsounds implausibly poignant---be cared about. New York doesn’t givea damn. It has seen thousands of us come and go.
今天中午我和纽约永别了，也就加入了越来越多因为这样或那样原因而决定离开这座城市的人群，他们都受够了它。这个人群中为当初选择纽约而后悔不迭的那些人不断用愤懑的语气大张挞伐纽约的种种不是，也就搞出了一个“纽约已死”的话题。当然，实事求是的讲，纽约并不是座行将就木的城市。有800万人选择挤住在那个“弹丸之地”，也许他们早知道纽约存在无药可救的问题，但是他们却乐见其成。纽约必定曾经给过它的居民很多乐趣，也许那样的事未来还会有。但像我们这些选择搬离它的人来说，要相信未来实在太难了，因为我们都是些缺乏耐心和想象力的人。
在纽约住了十年，此刻分手在即，回首往事说起来我该流下一两滴伤心泪。但令人沮丧的正在于此——我一点也不为自己的离开而难过。如果把纽约比作是一位女子，那么我和她从未恋爱成婚，没有山盟海誓，也没有情话呢喃，最多只不过是调调情，逢场作戏罢了。有很多文学作品在表达“觉醒了的纽约客”这个主题，我也读过不少，但是其中没有一件能契合我对于这座城市的感受。我不憎恶纽约，因为它对我并无可憎之处，当然可爱的地方就更少。这就是问题的所在，纽约冷漠无情，我只能“以彼之道还施彼身”。
许多人觉得纽约的环境卫生太差，居住其间实在扫兴。这个嘛，老天作证，纽约的卫生状况实在叫人不敢恭维。我怀疑这个因素在我们这些人搬离纽约的决定中扮演了重要的角色。那不勒斯比或孟买，还有无数其他城市可能比纽约更脏乱，但只要一个城市中有激动人心的事物，容忍垃圾四溢、污水横流也并非难事。丹吉尔可谓这个世界上最脏的城市之一，但我的一个住在那儿老城区的朋友却安之若素，压根儿不想挪窝儿。几天前，我在纽约中央公园看到一个男子斜倚在垃圾桶上啜饮橘子汁，当他喝完，没把包装盒放进垃圾桶而是扔在了地上。
我不能理解这种行径，而在纽约城中，我不能理解的事情还有很多。归结起来，我不能理解为什么纽约这座城市没有灵魂，仿佛一个没有心脏跳动的活死人，她情感中最显著的部分就是冷漠无情。我觉得自己正是因此才选择离开她的。维也纳以关怀备至的城市精神让她的居民受用不已；在巴黎，城市和人都是一道风景，相辅相成；而在三藩市，即使是初来乍到的人也能感受到她散发出的海纳百川的磅礴大气。但是说到纽约的气质，那就是对一切的漠不关心。这些年来，在我寓所的庭院附近，只能听见一只狗总在黑夜中狂吠的声音，有时候我的狗会发出尖利的吠声作为回应。我真希望纽约的居民们能向这些狗学学，那样我才愿意相信他们对外来刺激做出反应的能力还没有丧失。
一大部分人是因为恐惧才离开纽约的，他们觉得自己仿佛被围困在这座城市中，如果离家太远自己就可能被抢劫，或者更糟——被杀害。可能是因为自己的大块头并不适合犯罪分子下手，我倒从没遇上过抢劫或是被揍。但我却从脑海中忆起这么一件惨案：一晚，当一位女士在巴士站出口处的贩卖机购买杂志时，一位陌生人走过来并用一把屠刀剖开这位女士的胸腹。当凶犯落网后，他向警方供认，自己并不认识那位女士，他只是“喜欢杀人”而已。要在这样的疯狂中保全自己是不可能的，我也因此觉着纽约骨子里并不是个懦夫，但却是个蠢货。
我还想起，有一年元旦前夜，在一次聚餐之后，我的一位朋友上街去打车回家，出租车刹车不及撞到了他。我和朋友的妻子把他抱上车去了兰诺克斯山医院，正当我们为朋友寻求紧急救治时，肇事司机却一个劲地对着我们大喊大叫，仿佛是我们的错。几个星期前，一个年仅15岁的女孩在地铁中遭人强暴。第二天警方却称在这起事件中，女孩也得负部分责任，谁叫她偏偏进了一个除了强奸犯没有其他乘客的车厢。可能在其他城市中也会发生这样的案件，这点几无疑问，但是纽约的人们所表现出的对生命的漠视和对是非正义的病态心理，让我很难接受也无法释怀。
如今犯罪蔓延，纽约的犯罪率并不是这个国家中最高的。也许困扰我们的还是这里犯罪的类型，那种除了人身攻击之外的极端卑劣。以下是我刚刚从报纸上读到的：有三位上了年纪的老人，他们住在同一间公寓里，因为患有脑瘫，他们都不得不坐在轮椅上度日，而就是这样可怜的弱者也遭到入室盗窃者的劫掠；三个不会讲英语的墨西哥游客从肯尼迪国际机场乘车到纽约市中心，司机宰客要价167美元；最近，又有217位盲眼卖报人哭诉他们的辛酸遭遇：路人们从他们的盘子里偷走硬币，顾客经常少找钱，在夜间回家时屡遭劫匪光顾；一家银行专门协助盲人顾客办理存储手续的工作人员最近被控伪造文件和欺诈，因为他的一名顾客发现自己的账目上少了一大笔钱，2857美元的存款只剩下167美元；在去年中央公园自行车赛期间，有5位参赛者遭到攻击并被人抢走自行车，这让比赛可笑的成为了“障碍赛”。
我不能接受这种理论，它认为纽约是因为太大了才导致鱼龙混杂。巴黎玛德琳大街边的妓女们会对着过往的行人轻声呢喃：“晚上好”，而她们纽约的同行们却似乎需要携带武器才能自保。果不其然，前西德财长在广场酒店前被两名妓女纠缠并被抢走180美元。
纽约人其它的小奸小恶就更不胜枚举了，几乎随处可见。驾车的人经常在红灯亮起后仍然闯线，引起路人的恐慌似乎是他们的乐趣；出租车司机在你到达目的地后仍然不停止打表，这样他就能在你拿钱付账时多挣上10美分，这点小钱似乎比他一天所挣的正当收入更能使他快乐；而衣帽间的女侍者们似乎从不带零钱以便找给顾客。几乎所有的纽约人都有这样的毛病。
我并不是故意花这么多时间来谈论纽约的糟糕治安，提供这些案例只是为了介绍一下存在于纽约的罪行种类，倒不是要夸大它们的危害程度。我对这座城市的行政制度也是无可奈何，纽约被大大小小的工会控制着，留给市长和市参议会周旋的余地已经很微不足道了。拉塞尔·贝克，是一个眼光毒辣、见解独到的讽刺家，他曾写道自己对所谓的纽约现象——罢工——非常熟悉，那些工会轮流上阵，罢工歇业。他所惊奇的不是这些罢工的举行，而是一般纽约人对罢工造成的不便那种“逆来顺受”的消极态度。说得对极了，千真万确。这种让我无法忍受的消极态度经常使我突发奇想：在纽约有没有人，哪怕只有一个，对这没完没了的罢工感到愤怒？会不会有一个纽约人站出来说：“够了，我再也不能忍了”？我认为没有。十年前那场著名的停电事件中，一位妇人坐在停止运行的地铁中长达8小时，她随身带着一块蛋糕。当问及问什么她没有吃掉蛋糕时，她这样回答：“我一点也不在乎”。这就是纽约的消极和冷漠。
我不想在中央公园看到孩子们于没有任何标记警示的栎叶毒漆树旁玩耍；我也不想再看到雕像和墙壁上那些不堪入目的涂鸦；我再不想乘坐那个早该淘汰的老旧地铁，它的路标模糊不清以致连地铁公司的人都不知道方向在哪里。而由于某些原因，我对这座城市的人以挤到Elaine餐馆吃饭为时尚感到特别的愤怒。这座餐馆的饭菜一般般，只是因为名流云集而大受欢迎。
当然，纽约也有一些值得我怀念的东西，我只能期望在别处也能找到同样的安慰。几星期前，在一场急促的暴风雨后，我从湖边穿过中央公园，我觉得自己从没有发现纽约如此明艳动人。高楼上的钢材和玻璃反射着阳光，在雨后清新的空气中显得由外明亮。最近的一个早晨，我在走到74号大道时遇上一个年轻人，没有特别的原因，他朝着我微笑并打招呼：“你好”。纽约女孩的美貌和活力也是举世无双的，她们目标笃定，步伐迅捷有力，脸上洋溢着朝气，充满了生命力。而纽约这个城市的节奏也是令人兴奋的。
写到这里，这篇文章也该结束了。我还是不想住在这样一座城市中，当一位女士为丢失的小狗刊登寻物启事时，这座城市里的一大帮骗子会打来电话要挟大笔的赎金；或是在这座城市出行时必须随身为可能遇到的劫匪预备上10美元，否则遇上了就得被人扎一刀；或是这座城市的邮递员们都厚颜无耻地在圣诞节索要更多的小费，他们通常会在你的信箱里留下暗示。可能不管我搬到哪里，这些事情都会发生，甚至一件不落，但我就是不信邪。总之，我想逃离纽约的冷漠和消极，我想去关心他人和别他人关心（听起来真心酸）。纽约不会在乎这一切，对于人的来来往往，她已经司空见惯了。
