幽默笑话大全 爆笑 爆笑的英语笑话阅读_幽默英语笑话精选

笑话是幽默的语言表达。它是一种常见的幽默传达方式。本文是爆笑的英语笑话,希望对大家有帮助!

幽默笑话大全 爆笑 爆笑的英语笑话阅读_幽默英语笑话精选

爆笑的英语笑话:A Girl's Name

When our daughter was born, we named her Myles, after my beloved late(已故的) father, despite family warning that the name was too masculine(男性的) .

Years later, when I felt she was old enough to understand, I explained to Myles, Your name is very special. I named you after my own father because I loved him very much. I know he would be proud of you.

Myles thought carefully about this and then said, I know all that, Mom. But I don't understand why my grandfather had a girl's name.

女孩的名字

女儿出生时,我们给她取名叫迈尔斯,和我深爱的业已过世的父亲同一个名字,不过家人提醒这个名字太男性化了。

几年以后,我觉得迈尔斯已经长大,能够懂事了。我对她解释说:你的名字很特别。我给你取了一个和我爸爸一样的名字,因为我非常爱他。我相信他会为你而深感自豪的。

迈尔斯很仔细地想了一下,然后说道:这些我都懂,妈妈。可是我不知道外公为什么会有一个女孩子的名字。

爆笑的英语笑话:I Taught the Teacher 我教老师

Mother asked her little boy, Darling, what did the teacher teach you today?

Nothing, Mum, answered the son proundly, instead, she asked me how much one plus two was, and I told her three.

母亲问她年幼的儿子:宝贝,今天老师教了你些什么?

儿子骄傲地说:什么都没教,妈妈。她反倒问我一加二等于几,我告诉她等于三。

爆笑的英语笑话:Girl's Name 女孩的名字

When our daughter was born, we named her Myles, after my beloved late father, despite family warning that the name was too masculine(男性的) .

Years later, when I felt she was old enough to understand, I explained to Myles, Your name is very special. I named you after my own father because I loved him very much. I know he would be proud of you.

Myles thought carefully about this and then said, I know all that, Mom. But I don't understand why my grandfather had a girl's name.

女儿出生时,我们给她取名叫迈尔斯,和我深爱的业已过世的父亲同一个名字,不顾家人提醒这个名字太男性化了。

几年以后,我觉得迈尔斯已经长大,能够懂事了。我对她解释说:你的名字很特别。我给你取了一个和我爸爸一样的名字,因为我非常爱他。我相信他会为你而深感自豪的。

迈尔斯很仔细地想了一下,然后说道:这些我都懂,妈妈。可是我不知道外公为什么会有一个女孩子的名字。

爆笑的英语笑话:Christmas Present

Little Johnny had a cussing problem and his father was getting tired of it. He decided to ask his shrink what to do. The shrink said, "Since Christmas is coming up, you should ask Johnny what he wants Santa to bring him. If he cusses while he tells you his wish list, leave a pile of dog poop in place of the gift or gifts he requests."

Two days before Christmas, Johnny's father asked him what he wanted for Christmas. "I want a damn teddy-bear laying right beside me when I wake-up. When I go downstairs I want to see a damn train going around the damn tree. And when I go outside I want to see a damn bike leaning up against the damn garage."

Christmas morning, Little Johnny woke up and rolled over into a pile of dog poop. Confused, he walked down stairs and saw another pile under the tree. Scratching his head, he walked outside and saw a huge pile of dog poop by the garage.

When Johnny walked back inside with a curious look on his face, his dad smiled and asked, "What did Santa bring you this year?"

Johnny replied,"I think I got a dog but I can't find the son-of-a-bitch!"

爆笑的英语笑话:Getting Herpes

A little boy walks down the street with a dead frog on a string.

He enters a whorehouse and approaches the madam.

"Madam, I would like to have a girl for the afternoon." says the little boy.

"Sonny, I think you're a little young for that." replies the madam.

The little boy places a $100 bill in the madam's hand.

"One lady coming up." says the madam.

"And I want her to have herpes," says the little boy.

"Why on earth would you want that?" asked the madam, "and anyway, I don't have any women like that. All my girls are clean."

The little boy pulls out another $100 bill and gives it to the madam.

"One dirty girl, coming up," she says.

The madam takes the little boy upstairs and leaves him in a room with a well endowed blonde. When he comes down a little bit later, she says, "Son, I can understand you wanting to get laid, but why on earth would you want to catch something like herpes?"

The little boy looks the madam straight in the eye and says, "It's like this lady... When I get home the babysitter's going to be there and I'm gonna ***** her and SHE'S going to get the herpes.

Then when my mom and dad come home, my dad's going to take the babysitter home and ***** her and HE'S going to get the herpes.

Then when my dad gets home, he's going to ***** my mom and SHE'S going to get the herpes.

Then about 10 o'clock tomorrow morning, the mailman's going to show up at my house and ***** my mom and HE'S THE ONE THAT KILLED MY ***** FROG!"

  

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