在大家情绪低落的时候讲一个笑话,可以让大家笑得心中的怨气都烟消云散了。小编精心收集了关于1分钟英文小笑话,供大家欣赏学习!
关于1分钟英文小笑话:简单的税率
MAN: Who could that be? "KNOCK KNOCK"
MAN: KOYER THE LAWYER!What brings you here?
LAWYER:A public service.I bring important news form the king regarding taxes.
LAWYER:"Due to popular demand the tax structure will be greatly simplified...Henceforth,one basic tax rate will be charged to everyone!"
MAN: May we ask what the rate will be?
LAWYER:100%
MAN: What could be simpler than that?
man:会是谁来了? "砰 砰"
man:是柯耶律师!什么风把你吹来的?
律师:我为公事而来.我从国王那里带来有关纳税的重要消息.
律师:"由于民众的请求,赋税结构将大为简化...从现在开始,每个人都负担统一的基本税率!"
man:可以请教税率会变成多少么?
律师:100%
man:还有比那更简单的么?
关于1分钟英文小笑话:son-in-law
A 60 year old woman came home one day and heard strange noises in her bedroom. She opened the door and discovered her 40 year old daughter playing with a vibrator. "What are you doing?" asked the mother.
"Mom, I'm 40 years old, and look at me. I'm ugly. I'll never get married so this is pretty much my husband." The mother walked out of the room shaking her head.
The next day, the father came home and heard noises in the bedroom. Upon entering the room, he found his daughter using the vibrator.
"What the hell are you doing he asked.
His daughter replied, "I already told mom. I'm 40 years old now and I'm ugly. I will never get married so this is as close as I'll ever get to a husband." The father walked out of the room shaking his head.
The next day, the mother came home and found her husband with a beer in one hand and the vibrator in the other watching the football game on
TV. "What on Earth are you doing?" she cried.
The husband replied, "What does it look like I'm doing? I'm having a beer and watching the football game with my son-in-law!!"
关于1分钟英文小笑话:you're not going to make it 你活不成了
Gravely ill, a man went to the doctor with his wife. After the examination the physician motioned for the wife to meet him in the hallway.
一个人得了重病,妻子伴随他去看医生。检查过后,医生示意病人的妻子到走廊见他。
"Your husband is very sick, " the doctor said, "but there are three things you can do to ensure his survival. First, fix him three healthful, delicious meals a day. Next, give him a stress-free environment , and don't complain about anything. Finally, make passionate love to him every day.
“你丈夫病得很重,”医生说,“但有三件事可保住他的性命。第一,一日三餐,要营养美味。第二,给他一个轻松的环境,不要抱怨。第三,每天都对他倾注炽热的爱。”
On the drive home the husband asked, "What did the doctor say?"
在驱车回家的路上,丈夫问道:“医生说了什么?”
"I'm sorry, " she said, "but you're not going to make it.
“很遗憾,”她说,“你活不成了。”
关于1分钟英文小笑话:Who Should be Given the Present? 礼物该给谁?
A father of five came home with a toy, summoned his children and asked which one of them should be given the present, “Who is the most obedient, never talks back to mother and does everything he or she is told?” he inquired. There was silence and then a chorus of voices: “You play with it, Daddy!”
一个有五个孩子的父亲带着一件玩具回到家里,把孩子们召集来问这件礼物应该给谁。“谁最听话,从不和妈妈顶嘴,让干什么就干什么?”他问道。
大家都不吭声。过了一会儿,孩子们异口同声地说:“爸爸,您玩儿吧。”
关于1分钟英文小笑话:The Clock
Hillary Clinton died and went to heaven. As she stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates she saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.
She asked, "What are all those clocks?"???
St Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."
"Oh," said Hillary, "who's clock is that?"
"That's Mother Theresa's. The hands have never moved indicating that she never told a lie."
"Who's clock is that?" "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have only moved twice telling us that Abe only told 2 lies in his entire life."
"Where is Bill's clock?" Hillary asked.
"Bill's clock is in Jesus' office. He is using it as a ceiling fan."