简单英语短文 英语爆笑简单短文

下面是小编整理的英语爆笑简单短文,希望大家会喜欢!

英语爆笑简单短文:上英语课

上英语课,老师问:“知识是什么?”全班人回答:“knowledge !”就我一个特么特大声的说:“力量!!!”

英语爆笑简单短文:鸭子的英语

“苹果用英语怎么说?”我问。“Apple”侄女高兴地回答。“香蕉用英语怎么说”我接着问。“Banana‘她快速地答到。“嗯,不错啊,那小鸭子用英语怎么说啊?”小侄女犹豫了一下,接着答“嘎,嘎……”

英语爆笑简单短文:一笑而过英文版

你伤害了Word,还Excel而过,你Access的贪婪,我Outlook懦弱。One泪Note过,回忆是多Binder,只怪自己Mail你PowerPoint。

英语爆笑简单短文:Can you speak English

去年春节回老家时,看到一个老外在向一个农民伯伯问路。只见那个老外一边说着生硬的中文,一边用手笔划,但那个农民伯伯却还是不明白。最后,那个农民伯伯说了一句让我至今难忘的话:“Can you speak English?”

英语爆笑简单短文:how much

刚刚去营业厅冲话费,听到服务小姐说,how much?我愣了好久,没反应过来,心想英语都普及到这地步了?遂回答,50。他也愣了,又重复了一次,我这才听明白她刚才说的是,号码是?

英语爆笑简单短文:外国同事

我们外国同事突然问我:你们中国人最爱用的外语口头禅是不是“what‘s up‘?感觉你们见面时常说“what‘s up‘,有时候自己对着电脑都会自言自语说,是受美国文化影响么?我想了半天是不是有这么回事,然后突然恍然大悟,对她说:我操!

英语爆笑简单短文:香蕉用英语怎么说?

“闺女,香蕉用英语怎么说?”“banana!”“苹果呢?”“iPhone!”“那大苹果呢?”“iPad!”

英语爆笑简单短文:兔子的论文

It's a fine sunny day in the forest, and a rabbit is sitting outside his burrow, tippy-tapping on his typewriter. Along comes a fox, out for a walk.

这是一个阳光灿烂的晴朗日子,森林里一只小兔子坐在洞穴外,在打字机上敲敲打打。这时一只散步的狐狸走了过来。

Fox: "What are you working on?"

狐狸:“你在做什么呢?”

Rabbit: "My thesis."

兔子:“写我的论文。”

简单英语短文 英语爆笑简单短文

Fox: "Hmmm. What's it about?"

狐狸:“唔,是关于什么的?”

Rabbit: "Oh, I'm writing about how rabbits eat foxes."

兔子:“噢,我在写兔子是怎样吃掉狐狸的。”

Fox: "That's ridiculous! Any fool knows that rabbits don't eat foxes."

狐狸:“你太搞笑了吧!谁都知道兔子不吃狐狸。”

Rabbit: "Sure they do, and I can prove it. Come with me."

兔子:“兔子当然吃,我能证明的。跟我来。”

They both disappear into the rabbit's burrow. After a few minutes, the rabbit returns, alone, to his typewriter and resumes typing.

它们一起消失在兔子的洞穴里,几分钟后只有兔子独自出来了。它回到打字机前继续敲打。

Soon, a wolf comes along and stops to watch the hardworking rabbit.

很快,一只狼走了过来,停下看着兔子奋力工作。

Wolf: "What's that you're writing?"

狼:“你在写什么呢?”

Rabbit: "I'm doing a thesis on how rabbits eat wolves."

兔子:“我在写论文,关于兔子如何吃掉狼。”

Wolf: "You don't expect to get such rubbish published, do you?"

狼:“你不会指望这种垃圾论文被发表吧!”

Rabbit: "No problem. Do you want to see why?"

兔子:“能发表,你想知道为什么吗?”

The rabbit and the wolf go into the burrow, and again the rabbit returns by himself, after a few minutes, and goes back to typing.

兔子和狼一起进了洞穴,而兔子又一次独自走了出来。几分钟后它继续打字。

Inside the rabbit's burrow: In one corner, there is a pile of fox bones. In another corner, a pile of wolf bones. On the other side of the room, a huge lion is belching and picking his teeth.

兔子洞穴里:一个角落里是一堆狐狸骨头,另一角落里是一堆狼骨头。而另一侧是一只狮子,它边打着饱嗝,边剔着牙齿。

It doesn't matter what you choose for a thesis subject.

论文的题目选什么无关紧要。

It doesn't matter what you use for data.

你用什么作为例证数据也无关紧要。

What does matter is who you have for a thesis advisor.

真正重要的是:你的论文导师是谁!

  

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